Counseling was the first attempt to freeing myself from the toxic mental prison. My mother had to drive me every other week to my appointments. She needed to know we were trying our best to make me better, so I was put on medication two pills. The one pill would help with my depression and work as a sleep aid. The second pill would help with my crying spells and flashbacks, PTSD. The medication nullified the part of me that made me happy. After months of my anger being drugged out, I decided to stop the medication and tried to find a better way to help myself. I, after the first wave of emotions, left my system, felt a little more in control. I felt that I had emerged from the rabbit hole, slowly finding my way back to my cell. I was determined to better myself and continue with counseling. …show more content…
Phil Show, to learn healthier coping mechanism. I started to use coping skills like baking, drawing on myself, talking to people, crafts, and exercising. I used any opportunity to better myself and spend that good mental habits with others. My final attempt to gain control of myself was to allow myself to accept the guidance or my family. I wanted to repair my relationship with them and fix my reputation as I grew better. I wanted the respect that I earned in my childhood. I allowed myself to be vulnerable around them and I was made the poster child of mental illness and weakness. The knowledge I gained from research expanded my mind and I couldn’t accept their norms or expectations. I wanted to become healthy; therefore, I rewired all my core settings to allow myself to grow as an