Success (noun): the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals. According to dictionary.com, this is the definition of what being successful is. But who is really the one who decides what success can be? Or not be? Everyone has their own definition of success. Mine, is quite simple. Being happy. That is my main goal in life. To be happy, overjoyed, completely in love with my life. Once I feel this way about my life, I will have achieved success. Although this is simple, it is not as easy as it sounds.
Throughout my life I have struggled with being happy. It’s not that I didn’t want to be, but I just couldn’t. I physically could not be happy. This wasn’t because I didn’t know how to smile or laugh or appreciate things I had but it was due to my brain chemistry. In the winter of my 8th grade year, something was different. It got harder to get out of bed in the morning, things that I had loved didn’t seem to interest me anymore, I didn’t want to hangout with my friends or even eat. Depression. What damage that ten letter word did to my life.
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Although some days, weeks, months would be better than others, I would always come down from the maniac, right back into the depression. I tried so hard to get better but never knew how to get there. Sure the antidepressants would help, but they couldn’t do everything for me. Although sometimes I wish this horrible sadness wouldn’t have engulfed me at the age of 14, I’m glad it did. A weird thing to say, I know. But without having the lows I would never have learned to appreciate the highs. And I can’t even begin to thank the people who helped me along the way. The people who constantly reminded me that just because I was struggling it didn’t make me unlovable or undeserving of care. Which was a reminder I often