People express many sympathies upon the death of a loved one.
Words like…
“It’s good that they are not suffering anymore,”
“It was quick,”
Or “They’re in a better place.”
Perhaps they have experienced the loss of a loved one and have come to terms with their passing, or perhaps they have not.
Some accept the loss, while others do not.
How do you live through the loss of a loved one and then go on without them?
Pancreatic cancer is a death sentence.
It is aggressive—it is cunning.
By the time you expose it, it has usually spread to other organs—there is no cure.
Even with surgery, the reality is that it returns with a vengeance.
Only 8% of people in Canada with pancreatic cancer are still alive five years after diagnosis.
More often
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What's left is a crushing, overwhelming, devastating, deep-seated sorrow.
Preparing a funeral, feeling torn and shattered.
Family urging you, holding you tight, and staying close—adhering to all your wishes.
They take care of everything for you—like a newborn babe.
It’s like you are a sleepwalker, unable to think.
At least you get to say goodbye, I love you, I’ll miss you, see you in Heaven.
Friends and family hug and console.
Events blur, yet there are some crystal clear thoughts—the beautiful blue sky; the color of their shirt, all the ladybugs; angels in disguise to escort them up to Heaven.
Then family slowly steps away so you can learn your new life.
And, you panic—you don’t want to learn a new life without your loved one.
Things just can’t go back to normal—you just want everything to stop.
But, there are the children…
The children become your anchor; their force keeps you going.
To feed, to nurture.
You begin by doing only the small tasks.
You gaze into the face of strangers and wonder if your pain shows on your face?
Did they lose someone too?
Can you see the pain in their face?
With memories in your heart, you slowly begin to create a new