Rabit Themes

RABBIT presents as a character driven sports drama. The script showcases the life of a young, emotionally scarred foster child, who gets a second chance to have a happy life when a caring coach recognizes her running talent. The concept reminds one of the award-winning BLIND SIDE movie.

The tone is consistently dramatic. There are solid themes about second chances, trust, abandonment, never giving up, and overcoming adversity. The idea that Rabbit excels at running nicely fits with her inner struggle of running from emotional attachment.

A very likable female protagonist, Rabbit, drives the story. She’s complex and flawed. She doesn’t always make the right choices, but the audience easily forgives her and roots for her to be happy.

The

He sees the good in her. The idea that she’s resistant to join the team works well. When she joins, however, she immediately seems to quit when she disappears. Consider making her “quit” at the midpoint. After she joins the team, focus more on her relationship with the other team members and preparing for her racing meet.

Consider highlighting the idea of a “major” race or championship race. This is a tried and true formula in sports drama. This builds anticipation to the final race. In the end, Rabbit would overcome her emotional struggle (mother, abandonment), as well as her physical struggle winning the race. Working towards a championship gives the story and the character a solid physical goal, while also struggling with the emotional goal. It will focus the structure. It will naturally generate tension.

Instead of using Donna as the main tension, one can use Skylar or another racer from another team. Maybe they try to get Rabbit kicked off the team by planting drugs in her locker. However, the idea of drugs has to be foreshadowed. Maybe Rabbit has trouble with learning (learning disorder)and this can add another layer of

It’s a bit unsatisfying that she doesn’t believe Rabbit.

Skylar is a troubled girl. She’s somewhat neglected by her mother and she’s desperate to get a scholarship. She’s vulnerable and also has a hard exterior. However, as stated, her story is too much like Rabbit.

The janitor, Bernie is, again, likable. It’s touching when he leaves a food bag for Rabbit.

Donna, Eddie, and the principal, however, are presented as being too one-dimensional. They present as being all “bad” and evil. Most characters/people have more than one side.

The dialogue has strengths and weaknesses. The voices reflect each character’s personality, morals, and values, but at the same time the dialogue is a bit on the nose or too straightforward, “She was gonna kidnap me and give me away!” The dialogue on page 96 is also considered on the nose. Sometimes Melissa and Saunders sound too formal with each other, as if not married.

The characters also tend to talk to one’s self and this begins to sound and look contrived. Avoid this and only use talking to one’s self if absolutely needed.

SUMMARY & MARKETABILITY

Social dramas can be difficult to market, especially about child