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Why Do Victims Stay In Abusive Relationships

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Many people believe that if a victim didn’t want to be abused then they would just leave the relationship however, according to the Domestic Violence Round Table there are several reasons why victims stay in an abusive relationship. The first reason victims stay in an abusive relationship is because of fear that their abuser may kill them or their children when they try to leave. In many abusive relationships, the most dangerous time for the victim is when they try to leave or when they leave and the abuser tracks them down to their new location that is why the location of many safe houses are kept confidential. The second reason why victims stay in an abusive relationship is because they believe it is their fault that the abuse is happening. …show more content…

The sixth reason victims don’t leave is fear of losing the children. Abusers will often threaten the victim that they will call child protective services and report them if they try to leave leading victims to stay in the relationship because they fear that if CPS is contacted she may lose the kids because she stayed in an abusive relationship. The seventh reason for victims staying in an abusive relationship is because they feel it may cause emotional harm to the children by not being able to see their other parent when they leave and go into hiding. The eighth reason victims stay in an abusive relationship is because they are unaware of help. Because many abusers isolate victims by not allowing them to leave the home or monitoring them while on the phone or computer, victims usually don’t know about services until the abuse has gotten so bad that the police or another agency such as CPS or APS has become involved. So, while many people believe that it is easy for a victim to leave a domestic violence situation there are many reasons why they can’t or are reluctant …show more content…

The first service that is available is shelters; this is where women and children who are under the age of 18 can go to have a safe place to sleep. The shelters usually provide the residents with toiletries, food, cleaning supplies and any other necessities they may need however the residents are responsible for cooking and cleaning up after themselves. The second service that is available to victims is counseling which is based on the feminist perspective and cognitive behavior therapy. The feminist perspective is used in a group setting and focuses on empowering the victim by reshaping their perceptions of self as a person of worth who can make choices for themselves. This therapy is done in a group setting to allow other victims to support one another. Cognitive behavior therapy is used in individual or group setting and consists of five phases. CBT helps victims replace distorted beliefs about themselves and their situations with more logical and useful thought. In the engagement phase the therapist and victim develop a relationship and create a safety plan. In the assessment phase the therapist assesses the victim’s current life circumstances and emotional state. In the goal identification phase the therapist helps the victim realize that they deserve a better life without abuse. In the action phase the therapist helps the victim

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140 Words | 1 Pages

- When abuse has been ongoing for a length of time , the victim can feel like she/he deserves the abuse, is in denial over the extent of the abuse, embarrassed about others finding out, fear being killed if they left and fear the impact on the children or losing the children. Many victims of domestic and family violence, believe nothing can be done for them- they see on the news how little action is done such as in the case of Benjamin Ard and the assault of two women. In this case Ard charged with domestic violence, but was released from jail on $1,000 cash bail. He went on to breach his bail and was then charged with domestic violence assault and violating the conditions of release from a prior charge; he was sentenced to only thirteen months

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709 Words | 3 Pages

Abusers always want things to get better but for some it never will. Some people don’t even recognize that they are in a abuse relationship, and if they do recognize they are still dealing with it because most likely their is a kid involved. If you think your in a domestic violence relationship contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline or you can think about the things I mention earlier and see is anything relates to you and your relationship. “Don’t let your loyalty become slavery. If they don’t appreciate what you bring to the table… then let them eat alone” - Anonymous.

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It is never fair to ask “Why will she not she leave?”. A victim can be defined as “an individual who has been confronted, attacked or violated by a perceived predator, resulting in short or long term physical and/ or mental injuries as a result.” (Burgess, Regehr & Roberts, 2012, p. 10). All of the women were victims to ongoing abuse by their partners and were at constant risk for revictimization. This further grasps the term of intimate partner violence which overarches what type of situations, these women were exposed to (Burgess et al., 2012, p. 290)

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Some people try to run away from their thoughts or others truly are trying to escape the fear and abuse of another person. Domestic violence and abuse can happen to anyone, yet the problem is often overlooked, excused, or denied. (Domestic Violence and Abuse, http://www.helpguide.org/) As in the case of Katie, the protagonist in the book Safe Haven by Nicholas Sparks. Katie has been running away from her abusive, alcoholic husband.

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883 Words | 4 Pages

In some cases, ensuring the victim does not leave the abuser is part of the abuse. The mind games an abuser will use to manipulate their victims into staying with them. Leslie also described wanting to leave but not knowing where

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This second coping mechanism was very interesting to read as many women do so and often found help within their friends, family or community resources however, not all run with the same opportunity to do so. Lastly, I found it important to know that “there is a difference in the use of coping strategies between women who experienced or witnessed abuse in their families or origin and the ones who did not experience or witnessed abuse” (Roberts, pg. 570). For those who have not been in an abusive situation we always think of why the victim didn’t leave the

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643 Words | 3 Pages

The second phase is challenging the automatic thoughts in which, the the therapist tells the client to listen to the negative thoughts and write them all down so that they can discuss them. By discussing the negative thoughts that flow through their head they can determine the cause of them and put a stop to the automatic thoughts. The third phase is identifying negative

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814 Words | 4 Pages

Why People Stay In Abusive Relationships Whether a person is male or female, they could still be in an abusive relationship and be scared to leave. “On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men” (NCADV). If abusive relationships are so damaging, why do people continue to stay is these relationships?

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781 Words | 4 Pages

They choose and stay for many reasons maybe they choose to be selfish for a positive outcome. We are humans and sometimes dominated by our flesh, we in our society make sacrifices in order to obtain what we most desire but I can say that in America’s society child abuse is unacceptable. Are some of us living in Omelas individually? There have been many cases where children are abused by one of their parents, adoptive or paternal, their step parents and because of “love” the good parent might accept it. People look into many features when creating a family sometimes leaving love at the end, am I going to be financially secure, will my children have quality education, or privilege’s that I alone cannot afford.

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Why Women Stay in Abusive Relationships With more and more women information coming out about abuse and rape, and different court cases about if rape or abuse in relationships actually happens, it is crucial to understand why the women in the relationships decide to stay. According to Kathryn Nowotnys journal article “Substance Abuse and Intimate Partner Violence”, “4.7 million women in the U.S. are physically assaulted by an intimate partner each year, and more than one in three women have experienced rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime.” This quote shows the importance of learning what the women in abusive relationships actually go through. We need to know what they are told and the effect it

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473 Words | 2 Pages

However, they’re even more worried about what will happen if they do. For example, they will fear that the abusive partner will find them and kill them if they spoke out. Another reason may be that their children involved and they don’t want to separate him/her from their other parent or they don’t want their children being involved. To add to that, many tend to stay because they have nothing of their own; no money, no family. Therefore they cannot support themselves and there isn’t anywhere for to them to go to be safe.

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1165 Words | 5 Pages

A lot of times when people hear and talk about domestic abuse, the lines are blurred around the term victim. Too many times people forget the true meaning of that word, especially concerning instances of domestic violence. There are many reasons why victims stay. Some victims believe that love is something that is strong enough to conquer even the worst of obstacles. In the eyes of these victims, the individual that they fell in love with and their abuser are practically two different people.

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283 Words | 2 Pages

Abusive partners may stalk victims who try to leave them, beat them severely, or otherwise attempt to control their ability to exit the relationship. If they don’t threaten to harm or kill the victim they may threaten or harm themselves. Partners in an abusive relationships have many reasons why to stay in a relationship. Some abused

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591 Words | 3 Pages

One in every four women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime. People sometimes get into relationships that can have abusive partners, the victim gets sucked into an endless cycle of abuse because of the following reasons, Women stay in abusive relationships because of Conflicting emotions, Reliance on the abusive partner and Low Self esteem. Some women stay in abusive relationships because of the conflicting emotions they have towards their abusive partner. Some of the emotions they have are fear, embarrassment, and love.

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793 Words | 4 Pages

The victim believes the problem is caused by themselves, and the violence is because of their actions within the relationship. This reason is most difficult to understand for the victim. Somebody in this situation does not realize there is a real problem in their way of thinking and the first step of the healing process for a mental illness is to accept to be sick. Moreover, in victims’ minds, aggressors are never wrong because victims place them on a pedestasl which avoids them of all responsibilities. To leave a domestic violence relationship, changing this aspect of their thinking is essential ; victims need to realize the harmful effect on their lives and they need to stop idealizing their

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