Eulogy Of Family

I was manipulated, my family was manipulated, I think we only saw what we wanted to see. I saw a man who always had his arms open when we got to the house in Arlington Virginia. A man I woke up for in the early hours of the morning to wait for him to come home from jogging. I saw a man who faught with his daughter for hours on end but I thought nothing of it. The only person who saw who he was, was my Aunt and yet she forgave him for doing things we couldn't even imagine him doing. But he did the unimaginable things, and I kept on running into his arms every time we went to see him and my Aunt. I like my family fell right into his trap and what would happen next was something that none of us could have fathomed happening. It was Christmas time and my family

My parents on the ride home said that Aunt Nanette and Uncle Mark were getting a divorce because Uncle Mark had broken a promise. I remember being so confused, and since I was only six when my parents told me there was only so much that I could know. But even the limitations of my knowledge of what uncle Mark had done didn't stop me from being ripped apart from the inside. After that day life went back to what it was before I had to move on, and that changed me. I became numb to emotion. I had rules like: thou shall not cry in public and thou shall not show any emotion when being yelled at. All these rules were a part of a shield I had created from the time I was six. My household environment was filled with anger and yelling, I lived in a place where it was survival of the fittest. If you stepped down from a fight you lost, if you showed the enemy that their yelling got to you, you lost. I learned to fight and stand up for my own and I loved it. Instead of cowering from yelling or screaming I reveled in it when my mom would yell at me I would laugh; I found the yelling and screaming funny and amusing. But that was because I had to or I would have drowned in all the emotions that went through the

How could you make me go through this much pain? I can't hide that hearing my parents fighting all of the time ripped me apart but I also can't hide that I became numb to all that. I hated that God had put me here in this family, where it seems that there is no ending to the list of bad things they have done because they were so damaged from my uncle. One can't forget when her cousins manipulate her into hating her family. I fell again and it lead to so much pain I became cold, I felt my heart turned cold and it scared me so much. I wasn't able to handle it anymore, I couldn't hear anymore that my cousin did this or my uncle also did that, it became too much. But just like always I got over it, and soon I would have another bomb dropped on me to get over. It was August 9th, 2017 or as my dad calls it pearl harbor day. My mom and I went to go get a bagel and sit by the Huron river by Kellogg eye center. I was sitting there surrounded by geese who wanted my bagel and my mom looked at me and said that she had something she needed to tell me. My first reaction was, " here we go" but like a good daughter I listened to what she had to say, but what she told me I would have never seen coming. She was going to separate from my dad until