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Sex Lies And Conversation Deborah Tannen Summary

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In "Sex, Lies and Conversation" by Deborah Tannen, the author explains her reasoning on why women get the impression that men do not listen. Some examples that Tannen states in her discovery are that men often change conversation quickly while women tend to talk about one topic at length. Women also complain about men not listening because they seem to be distracted as they look at things around the room and not specifically at them. The author proved this by saying that she analyzed videotapes created by psychologist Bruce Dorval on interactions between same-sex friends. Tannen noticed how men often turned at an angle not facing their friend, while women looked at each other directly. This tendency that men have give women the impression that they are not receiving full attention. …show more content…

Most women tend to have more responses when listening to someone, by saying “mhm” or “uhuh”. Which Tannen referenced from Lynette Hirschman who made an observation of the characteristics found in women. Then saying that men usually tend to react with silence unlike women, which leads them to believe that men are uninterested in the conversation. And just how women feel ignored, men often feel frustrated with the way women communicate. Men feel this way when women respond with too many listener noises because they deem it as overreaction as they are used to giving silent reactions. In addition to that when women finish each other’s sentences, men consider that as invasive, and interruptive. The author suggests that in order to mend the communication between marriages, the problem should be understood first which will allow improvement to come naturally. According to Tannen both men and women should try to understand each other and try to adapt when communicating but to also understand when they fail to adapt by acknowledging the

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